Haaaaa..harini ingat nak cakap london lah!:D
So, this will be my first post in English language..(or rojak..ahhhhh..Who's checking?:D)
U know, lately I'm feeling overwhelmed and lost. Especially after midsem results and raya holls. I'm seriously going through a phase of which I don't know or think about anything. U wanna know why I'm saying this? Well, lets see. I'm currently waaaaaayyyy behind in my studies. I take a look at my past lecture notes, and BAM! It dawned on me that I DONT UNDERSTAND 70 % OF THE THINGS THAT I HAVE IN MY FILES.
Freaky huh? Well, that's just the tip of the iceberg.
And lately im becoming lazier in copying lecture notes. I just snap away at the slides or whatever. If I miss something I just snap Liyana's notes. HAHA. Technology. And my tutorials, haishhhh. I DONT EVEN KNOW WHERE TO START. What I can't do, I just copy from others.(which is almost ALL) -again, using my lovely Lumix. Yeah, I'm becoming reckless i tell yah! And I quote from a dear friend of mine, "I'm leading myself towards the valley of doom".
And there's this thingy about my heart. *sigh* I can never admit my feelings. I just CAN'T. *double sigh*
Seriously, I don't even know what to do. The only thing that I can think of on how to release my worries and tension is trough jogging. Yup, JOGGING. Haha. I know, I once said that joggers are idiots. Blah3. But, really, when I jog, I focus on my breathing, my steps, and the trail. These things help me by stopping my brain from thinking about tutorials, lectures, etc2. I've ran twice in this week and I certainly like the feeling! =) jogging slowly, setting my own pace, it gives me a bit of serenity in this fast paced world.
But then, when I'm done jogging, my problems are still here. (Why don't they just disappear? >.<" )
So at the end, the problems persist. I'm living my days one by one. I plan my days in my planner, but once I plan something, I can't seem to execute it. I delay my work, or something comes up and I have to move or cancel the WHOLE PLAN. It's just..tiring..everything seems to hate or wanna mess with me..="( I'm lucky I have my dear friends here to keep me company. But then, they have their own problems and I really don't want to burden them. So yeah, I'm kinda alone amidst one thousand five hundred peeps at PASUM. Haha. Such irony.
Oh Allah, your tests are extremely hard on this humble servant of yours. The only thing I can do now is pray for your guidance and strength. Please, guide me. Show me how to cope with these things. Amin. =)
What do you think? What should I do? Please, I really need some feedback from you guys. Do leave a comment or post something at the shout box. =)